Day Three, Moving up and moving on

I have few memories that stand out in my mind from my elementary school years.  There are a few moments in time that I feel have had a substantial impact on the person I have become.


One of these memories revolves around my father.  I spent nearly all of my childhood completely in the dark as to who my father was.  Don't get me wrong, my mother showed me pictures and told me stories, but the man who rarely, if ever, paid child support, never came to visit, never sent cards, never called to wish me a happy birthday.  When I was around seven years of age, my mother received word that my father had been arrested, and was being held in the county jail.  At this point in our lives together, she had started dating the man who would later go on to marry her, adopt me, and give me a beautiful baby sister.  My future step-father stood back quietly while my mother informed me that for once she knew where my father was and that if I so chose, I could go and meet the man who had created my life.


I recall the visit occurring on a weekend shortly after my mother informed me of where my father was.  I had decided that I wanted to meet him, and so my mother brought me to the county jail.  I vividly remember entering the facility, walking through metal detectors and past officers with guns at the ready.  We proceeded through the jail to the visiting area, where we sat behind a piece of plexi-glass and we were able to speak to my father via a phone. The conversation that I remember was so uneventful and one-sided that it is almost unnecessary to convey the dialog.  In short, he promised to call, promised to write, and gave out so many other promises that were never fulfilled. 


I took the experience, and decided to put the man behind me, as a waste of time, a waste of tears, and a waste of energy.  Around the same time, my mother and I moved into our own home, which she had worked tirelessly to purchase for the two of us.  The new house meant a new school, new friends, and a lot of adjustments to deal with.


I never have dealt with change well.